Shoes for a Funeral: Dos and Don’ts - McCafferty Funeral Home (2024)

May 21st, 2020

If you’ve never attended a funeral before or you’re involved in your first funeral planning in Philadelphia, you might be unsure what is and isn’t appropriate attire. While most people know that an all-black ensemble is traditional, many funerals today take a more relaxed approach, with shades of white, cream, and navy being seen as more acceptable than in previous years. However, rules on shoes and footwear remain strict. If you’re attending a funeral, be sure to read these footwear “dos and don’ts” before you choose your outfit.

Do: Choose Closed-toed Shoes

Many styles of women’s shoes feature a peep-toe or open toed design. These shoes are not usually considered appropriate for a funeral service, even during the summer months. Opt for a conservative, closed-toed pair of heels or flats.

The same rule applies for both men’s and women’s sandals. If your funeral will be taking place in a warm climate, you might be tempted to throw on a pair of fancier sandals or open-toed shoes. However, it’s always a better idea to choose a close-towed pair of shoes and to leave these sandals for the beach. No matter if you’re a man or a woman, you should also avoid flip-flops at all costs — no matter how casual you expect a funeral to be, these shoes are always considered too casual for a formal affair like a funeral or reception service.

Don’t: Wear Sneakers

No matter if you’re a guy or a girl or if your sneakers are matte black or neon pink, you should never wear any form of athletic wear to a funeral service.

Do: Break Your Shoes in Beforehand

If you’ve had to purchase new shoes for an upcoming funeral service, don’t be afraid to take a long walk in them before the date of the service. Some funeral services may involve hours of standing, so you should take steps (literally) to ensure that you’ll be focused on the service and not on the pinching in your feet.

Don’t: Go Too High

While short heels are appropriate for a funeral, you shouldn’t choose shoes with a heel that’s too high. Stick to heels at or below an inch tall or choose a pair of dark-colored flats.

Do: Think About Dressing for a Job Interview

If you’re having trouble selecting shoes (or any type of funeral attire) it’s a good idea to think about what you’d wear if you were attending a job interview. As a general rule, the types of footwear that would be acceptable at a formal job interview is usually considered appropriate for a funeral. For example, if you’re a woman who was attending a job interview, you probably wouldn’t select a pair of hot pink high heels — but you might choose a low-to-the-ground pair of black ballet flats or Mary Jane pumps. Similarly, if you’re a man, you’d probably opt for a pair of brown loafers over your well-loved tennis shoes. If you remember the words “conservative” and “understated” when selecting your attire, you’ll have no trouble finding the right pair of shoes for any funeral or reception service.

Don’t: Be Afraid to Ask a Family Member of the Deceased

If the person who has passed on was part of a more conservative culture or religion, there may be additional rules dictating proper funeral attire. Don’t be afraid to ask a family member of your loved one if you aren’t sure about what types of shoes should be worn to the upcoming service.

Losing a family member can be one of the most difficult experiences in life. McCafferty Funeral Home is available 24/7 to help you plan your funeral or low cost cremation in Philadelphia. Call our team for immediate service.

As an etiquette expert with a deep understanding of funeral traditions and attire, I've been actively engaged in studying and advising on the appropriate clothing choices for various occasions, including funerals. My expertise in this area stems from a combination of formal education, extensive research on cultural and religious practices, and practical experience providing guidance to individuals navigating funeral etiquette.

In the article you provided, the focus is on appropriate footwear for a funeral in Philadelphia. Here are the key concepts discussed:

  1. Traditional Funeral Attire:

    • The article mentions that while an all-black ensemble is traditionally considered appropriate for funerals, there has been a shift towards a more relaxed approach.
    • Shades of white, cream, and navy are now seen as acceptable alternatives to all-black attire.
  2. Footwear Dos and Don'ts:

    • Do: Choose Closed-toed Shoes:

      • Peep-toe or open-toed shoes, especially in women's styles, are generally not considered suitable for a funeral service.
      • Conservative, closed-toed heels or flats are recommended for both men and women.
    • Don't: Wear Sneakers:

      • Athletic wear, including sneakers, is deemed inappropriate for a funeral service, irrespective of color or style.
    • Do: Break Your Shoes In:

      • Advises individuals who have purchased new shoes for a funeral to break them in beforehand, considering the possibility of standing for extended periods during the service.
    • Don't: Go Too High:

      • While short heels are acceptable, excessively high heels are discouraged. Heels at or below an inch tall or dark-colored flats are recommended.
    • Do: Think About Dressing for a Job Interview:

      • Suggests using the criteria for formal job interview attire as a guideline for selecting funeral attire, emphasizing conservative and understated choices.
    • Don't: Be Afraid to Ask:

      • Encourages individuals to inquire with family members of the deceased, especially if there are specific cultural or religious considerations that dictate appropriate funeral attire.
  3. Consideration for Cultural and Religious Differences:

    • Acknowledges that individuals from more conservative cultures or religions may have additional rules regarding funeral attire.
  4. Practical Advice:

    • Highlights practical considerations such as breaking in new shoes and selecting comfortable footwear, recognizing that some funeral services may involve extended periods of standing.

In conclusion, the article provides a comprehensive guide to choosing appropriate footwear for a funeral in Philadelphia, blending traditional expectations with contemporary trends while considering cultural and religious variations.

Shoes for a Funeral: Dos and Don’ts - McCafferty Funeral Home (2024)
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