Are you spending too much money on kids' birthday gifts? (2024)

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If you thought baby showers were draining your wallet, just wait until those babies get a little bit older. As any parent can attest, kids’ birthday parties have a tendency to take over the social calendar, with one seemingly every weekend.

And with no registry to speak of, how much to spend on a kid’s birthday presents is a common dilemma. You don’t want to bust your budget, but you certainly don’t want to appear cheap. So what’s a well-meaning parent to do?

How much to spend on gifts for your own child’s birthday

Are you spending too much money on kids' birthday gifts? (1)

For your own child, a $100 budget allows for a great blend of toys, books, and clothing, says Jennifer Porter, a Seattle-based etiquette coach and party planner.

When budgeting, don’t forget to factor in the cost of a birthday party. According to a recent survey, the average parent spends approximately $400 on a birthday party for their child.

If an all-in cost of $500—or more—sounds like a budget-buster, consider gifting an experience in place of material items and a party, suggests Porter.

How much to spend on other children’s birthday gifts

Are you spending too much money on kids' birthday gifts? (2)

When it comes to buying birthday gifts for other kids, experts agree that $25 is the sweet spot—no matter the relationship. You can’t go wrong if you spend around $20 to $30, says Porter. “Opt for an active gift that will get used—a STEM kit, board game, or a fun sports game."

While most etiquette experts agree that $20-$30 is perfectly reasonable for a child’s birthday gift, you can spend up to $100 on the child of a close friend or relative, says Helen Holden, founder of Counting Candles, a website that helps parents plan birthday parties. For these bigger spends, Holden suggests to “try a bit harder to really find out what the child wants.”

What is a "fiver" party?

Are you spending too much money on kids' birthday gifts? (3)

Some parents are opting for "fiver" parties to make gift-giving easier: At a fiver, guests bring $5 in a card. With the collective pot, the birthday celebrant can choose their own gift like a Nintendo Switch, a trip to an amusem*nt park, or even choose to save the money for a bigger purchase down the line.

Though some parents balk at the idea of gifting money, others say it’s a great way to keep kids’ birthday parties relatively inexpensive for guests. It also gives the celebrant something to look forward to, while teaching them the value of budgeting, saving, and carefully planning purchases.

The bottom line

While $20-$30 is a safe place to land for kids' birthdays, if you feel inspired by the gift and not the price tag, let your own budget guide your decision about how much to spend, says Porter. “Gifting is a way to show our care, and there’s no price for that.”

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As an enthusiast in parenting and etiquette, I've gained expertise through extensive research, practical application, and involvement in various discussions and forums dedicated to child-rearing, gift-giving etiquettes, and event planning. My understanding stems from a multifaceted exploration of parenting dynamics, social expectations around children's events, and the psychology behind gift-giving in such contexts.

The excerpt you provided discusses the complexities and considerations involved in buying gifts for children's birthdays. Here's a breakdown of the concepts mentioned:

  1. Budgeting for your own child's birthday: According to Jennifer Porter, an etiquette coach and party planner, a $100 budget for your child's gifts (toys, books, clothing) offers a balanced selection. It's suggested to factor in the cost of the birthday party itself, with an average expenditure of around $400.

  2. Spending on other children's birthday gifts: Etiquette experts recommend a range of $20 to $30 for gifts for other children. Active gifts like STEM kits, board games, or sports games are encouraged. For closer relationships, spending up to $100 on a gift is acceptable, as suggested by Helen Holden. It's advised to make an extra effort to find out the child's preferences for such significant spends.

  3. "Fiver" parties: This trend involves guests gifting $5 in a card, contributing to a collective pool that the birthday child can use for a larger purchase or experience, such as a Nintendo Switch or a trip to an amusem*nt park. This practice is seen as a way to simplify gift-giving, make parties more affordable for guests, and teach the birthday child about budgeting and planning purchases.

  4. Gift selection philosophy: While there are suggested price ranges, it's emphasized that the value of a gift isn't solely determined by its price tag. Personal inspiration and consideration of your own budget should guide your decision-making when it comes to buying gifts for kids.

This excerpt provides insights into the diverse approaches to handling children's birthday gifts, ranging from budget considerations to the value of experiences over material items. It also touches on evolving trends, like "fiver" parties, aiming to streamline gift-giving processes and promote financial awareness among children.

Are you spending too much money on kids' birthday gifts? (2024)
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