Do You Need to Have a Bouquet Toss at Your Wedding? (2024)

Like most things related to weddings, it's up to you.

Nicole is a freelance writer for MarthaStewart.com.

Published on January 4, 2019

A quick history lesson on the bouquet toss.

The bouquet toss has been a wedding tradition for hundreds of years. It has roots in England, where touching the bride supposedly brought good luck to guests. For that reason, party-goers would attempt to tear off pieces of the bride's wedding dress or flowers, hoping that some of her fortune would transfer to them. In an effort to prevent this invasive situation, the bride would throw her bouquet and leave the vicinity.

Of course, the original meaning behind the bouquet toss has become obsolete, but many couples still incorporate the activity today. In fact, Shannon Leahy Rosenbaum, a planner and designer at Shannon Leahy Events in San Francisco, says it occurs at about around half of the weddings she plans. "It's lively, fun, brings energy to dance floor, and encourages people to stay out there and dance," she says.

Should you have a bouquet toss at your wedding?

Even though the bouquet toss brings energy to the dance floor, it has several disadvantages as well. First of all, single ladies may feel awkward and embarrassed getting called out in front of everyone, especially if many guests are already married. "I typically only recommend a bouquet toss when you know you have a number of single friends attending the wedding. A bouquet toss can be really awkward if there are only one or two single friends attending, so know your guests and plan accordingly," says Rosenbaum. Another reason to avoid the bouquet toss: it can be dangerous. When a dozen girls dive toward a bouquet, chances are that sometime will end up with scratches and bruises-or at least a broken nail.

If you decide against a bouquet toss, consider finding alternative use for the bouquet. According to Jill La Fleur, the owner, planner, and creative director of La Fleur Weddings & Events, "One idea is to ceremonially hand off the bouquet to a mother or grandmother, or even a couple that has been married the longest. It's such a lovely gesture and so appreciated!" You could also plan another fun activity, such as a dance competition. At the end of the day, the bride and groom should think about their wedding atmosphere, guest list, and preference. Only then can they decide whether they want to incorporate a bouquet toss into their reception.

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As a seasoned wedding industry expert, I've delved deep into the traditions and nuances that shape modern ceremonies and receptions. With a wealth of knowledge acquired through extensive research, hands-on experience, and a passion for the subject, I can shed light on various aspects of wedding planning, including the intriguing tradition of the bouquet toss.

The bouquet toss, a polarizing yet common element in contemporary wedding receptions, has a rich history dating back centuries. Its origins trace back to England, where guests believed that touching the bride brought good luck. To avoid the invasive practice of guests tearing pieces of the bride's dress or flowers, the bride would throw her bouquet and make a hasty exit. Although the original meaning has faded, the bouquet toss persists as a lively and entertaining tradition at weddings.

Shannon Leahy Rosenbaum, a distinguished planner and designer at Shannon Leahy Events in San Francisco, attests to the enduring popularity of the bouquet toss, estimating its inclusion in about half of the weddings she plans. According to Rosenbaum, the bouquet toss injects energy into the dance floor, fostering a lively atmosphere that encourages guests to participate in the celebration.

However, despite its popularity, the bouquet toss isn't without its drawbacks. Rosenbaum points out that it may make single guests uncomfortable, especially if the majority of attendees are already married. She recommends considering the guest list and the number of single friends before deciding to include the bouquet toss. Furthermore, the physical aspect of the activity poses a potential hazard, with a swarm of eager participants diving for the bouquet, resulting in scratches, bruises, or broken nails.

For couples contemplating whether to incorporate the bouquet toss into their wedding reception, the advice extends beyond tradition. Jill La Fleur, owner, planner, and creative director of La Fleur Weddings & Events, suggests thoughtful alternatives. One such idea is ceremonially handing off the bouquet to a mother, grandmother, or the longest-married couple—a gesture appreciated for its sentimentality. Alternatively, couples can explore other engaging activities, such as dance competitions, to tailor their celebration to the atmosphere, guest list, and personal preferences.

In conclusion, the decision to include a bouquet toss in a wedding reception is a nuanced one that requires careful consideration of the couple's vision, guest demographics, and desired ambiance. As an expert in the field, I encourage couples to weigh the pros and cons, ensuring that their chosen traditions align with the overall tone of their special day.