Dear Penny: I Have $700K, So Why Do I Get Panic Attacks Over Money? (2024)

Dear Penny,

I'm a 61-year-old woman with $700,000 saved for retirement. I own my own home (with a mortgage), and I have more than five months of daily expenses in a cash account. I have a few investment accounts in addition to the cash and I basically follow a 60/20/20 budget for my after-tax and after-retirement dollars.

Why can't I stop freaking out about money? I save for home repairs, and then freak out when I write the check. I save for a new car and then freak out when it's time to buy it. I HAVE THE MONEY.

I'm not poor, but I have been cash poor in the past. I have always saved for retirement, but I can't stop freaking out. And by freaking out, I mean literally days of heart-pounding panic attacks where Xanax is my only friend.

How do other people handle this?

-L.

Dear L.,

Fear is healthy to a degree. It’s what makes us wear our seatbelts and avoid dark alleys at night. Some level of money-related fear is also a good thing. If you didn’t worry there was a chance you’d run out of it, why wouldn’t you spend every dollar?

But there’s a big difference between healthy fear and the serious anxiety that you’re experiencing. An advice columnist is no substitute for mental health treatment. Whatever you do, it’s essential that you discuss your anxiety with a professional.

I wish I could tell you that $700,000 is more than enough for you. But that wouldn’t be an honest answer. There’s no way I can tell you with certainty that any level of savings is a guarantee you’ll never run out of money. Even billionaires wind up in bankruptcy court. But there’s plenty you can do to reduce the risk of whatever outcome you fear.

Financial health isn’t just about any one number. That $700,000 could be more than enough if you live in a low-cost area and plan to work for several more years. But if you live in Manhattan, you want to retire next year and people in your family frequently live past 100, it could leave you woefully short. Context is what matters here. The amount you have saved is meaningless without knowing your lifestyle, goals and concerns.

What I’m wondering is how much actual planning you’ve done beyond just saving. Do you have an age in mind for when you want to retire? Have you thought about when you’ll take Social Security? Do you plan to stay in your home and, if so, will you be mortgage-free by the time you retire?

All of this may seem overwhelming to think about when money already causes you so much stress. But worrying constantly plays a mind trick on you. You spend so much brain space and energy on worrying that it can feel like you’re actually taking action.

I want you to do what seems counterintuitive and think about the absolute worst-case scenarios. But I don’t want you doing this alone. I’d urge you to meet with a financial adviser, since you have the means to do so.

Write down your biggest fears so that you can discuss them together. Are you afraid of outliving your savings? Are you worried the market will crash right as you’re about to retire? Or that health care costs will eat up your retirement budget?

A financial adviser doesn’t have any special sourcery that can guarantee none of these things will happen. What they can do, though, is help you reduce the risk of those worst-case scenarios. If you’re worried about running out of money, they can help you plan how much you’ll safely be able to withdraw from retirement accounts and when you should take Social Security. Of course they can’t stop a stock market crash from happening, but they can make sure your investments are safely allocated based on your goals.

It sounds like you’re someone with a low risk tolerance, which means you probably want to invest conservatively. Perhaps a good investment for you would be to pay off that mortgage using a chunk of that savings. Will it be scary to fork over that much money at once? Of course, especially since the interest savings will probably pale compared to your investment returns. But if you can sleep more soundly knowing that what’s probably your biggest expense is taken care of, it could be worth it. I’m not saying that’s something you should absolutely do, but it’s worth discussing with your financial pro.

I suspect that when you think realistically about your worst-case scenarios, you’ll realize things aren’t as dire as you imagined. Suppose for some reason you had to quit working tomorrow. Your plans for retirement would probably change significantly. But at the same time, you wouldn’t be left without food or a home.

You say you’ve been cash poor in the past. Yet you overcame that and even managed to save for retirement when you didn’t have much money. You aren’t doomed to repeat your past.

I think if you do what’s scary and face your fears head-on — with the help of both a financial and a mental health professional — you can reduce the anxiety you feel about money. That’s not to say you’ll never worry about money again. But you can get to a place where fears about money aren’t dominating your life.

Robin Hartill is a certified financial planner and a senior writer at The Penny Hoarder. Send your tricky money questions to [emailprotected].

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Dear Penny: I Have $700K, So Why Do I Get Panic Attacks Over Money? (2024)

FAQs

Is $20 million enough to retire? ›

Imagine you're retiring at 50 years old with $20 million in the bank. Even if the money generated little interest or even none at all, you could afford to withdraw $500,000 per year for the next 40 decades. That means you could spend nearly $42,000 each month for 40 years if you live to 90.

What is the fear running out of money? ›

The survey findings paint a sobering snapshot, with nearly two-thirds of Americans harboring a greater fear of running out of money than of dying. That widespread concern is primarily driven by the challenges posed by high inflation, the reliability of Social Security, and the impact of high taxes.

Why am I so reluctant to retire? ›

And almost one in five say they're planning to delay retirement due to anxiety. 58% attribute their anxiety to not having saved enough money throughout their lifetime. 57% blame the cost-of-living crisis for their anxiety.

What is money anxiety disorder? ›

Everyone worries about money from time to time, but financial anxiety is different. Financial anxiety is an obsessive fear of things related to money that can often be debilitating. Financial anxiety can be triggered by any number of things, not just a lack of money.

What causes anxiety over money? ›

There are many potential causes of financial anxiety, though they are typically related to existing money troubles or a history of uncertainty around finances. This can include: Growing up in poverty, or in a household where money was often scarce.

What is a nervous breakdown over money? ›

Money problems can affect your mental health

Certain situations might trigger feelings of anxiety and panic, like opening envelopes or attending a benefits assessment. Worrying about money can lead to sleep problems. You might not be able to afford the things you need to stay well.

What age should you retire to enjoy life? ›

The normal retirement age is typically 65 or 66 for most people; this is when you can begin drawing your full Social Security retirement benefit. It could make sense to retire earlier or later, however, depending on your financial situation, needs and goals.

What is the number one fear of retirees? ›

1. Not having enough money: This is the number one fear of retirement, and for good reason. The cost of living continues to rise, and Social Security alone may not be enough to cover all of your expenses.

Is it normal to be scared to retire? ›

Many seniors, or even younger Americans, are afraid to retire. While not as terrifying as aerophobia (fear of flying), as common as nomophobia (fear of being without your phone) or as unnerving as coulrophobia (fear of clowns), fear of retirement is a real phenomenon for millions of older Americans.

Can 20 million last a lifetime? ›

Imagine you're retiring at 50 years old with $20 million in the bank. Even if the money generated little interest or even none at all, you could afford to withdraw $500,000 per year for the next 40 decades. That means you could spend nearly $42,000 each month for 40 years if you live to 90.

How many millions do you need to retire comfortably? ›

You need at least $1 million to retire comfortably in these 10 U.S. states—half are in the Northeast. On average, Americans believe they should save up around $1.46 million before retiring, per Northwestern Mutual's 2024 Planning and Progress study. But in certain states, like Hawaii, you'd actually need more than that ...

What can you buy with $20 million? ›

As a large investor you can buy real estate directly, purchasing assets like offices, rental properties, homes and more. Your investments will be far cheaper than they would be for other investors, because you can expect banks to offer extremely favorable terms on the underlying mortgages.

What age can you retire with $10 million? ›

At age 45, $10 million is more than enough to fund a very comfortable retirement. Whether it's enough to fund your retirement will depend entirely on your own, personal needs. If you're considering trying to retire at 45, take the time to consider your life and your budget to decide if you're able to make it work.

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