After a night spent strolling through the park, eating ice cream, or exchanging a knowing look while you clink glasses, you might be too busy replaying the splendor of it all — or relaying details to friends — to even think about crafting the perfect text to send after a first date. But it's often a good idea to send a follow-up message or two soon after, especially if you'd like to see this person again soon.
You could argue the most important thing isn’t what you say, but when you say it. Regardless of whatever “rules” you’ve heard in the past, don’t overthink the timing. “If you had a nice time and feel a connection, [send a text] after the date, once you’re home,” Mindie Barnett, a motivational speaker and host of a dating podcast, tells Bustle. “There is no ‘right time’ — if you’re authentic, that’s all that matters.”
Read more: 50 Example Sexting Ideas You Can Use Right Now
Steve Yang, a relationship coach, agrees. “I’m a very excitable and enthusiastic person who displays open [...] communication, so it’s entirely within character for me to text right away, and I often do,” he says. “There is no certain amount of time to wait that will work for everyone, [so] the best advice is to be consistent with who you are.”
In other words, if you want to send a message, send it! Here, we put together 25 quick-and-easy texts to consider firing off after a first date, all of which will hopefully hit the right note — and maybe even score you that second date.
It can be tough to think up the perfect thing to say when texting someone after a date, but it's actually much easier than it seems — lean into your sense of humor, include talking points from your date, and if it feels right, suggest an activity for a second hang.
Experts:
Mindie Barnett, motivational speaker and host of a dating podcast
You can start the follow-up text by telling them how much you enjoyed the date and thanking them for meeting up with you. This allows them to respond and let you know how they felt about the date. You can even suggest a fun second date idea if you want to see them again soon.
Popularized by the romcom, the three-day dating rule insists that a person wait three full days before contacting a potential suitor. A first-day text or call is too eager, a second-day contact seems planned, but three days is, somehow, the perfect amount of time.
Here are a couple of such examples of these texts that will make him chase you: "I just wanted to say how much I enjoy your sense of humor." You always manage to make me laugh.""That was such a thoughtful gesture you made yesterday.It really meant a lot to me."
The old dating myth that “men usually take time to text after the first date” shouldn't dictate your decision-making. While it's okay to text her half a day or even a day after the date, make sure you don't leave her waiting for way too long. That's only going to make her grow frustrated.
Talking with your mouthful. Being loud and swearing a lot in public. God forbid belching. Out of all the men's turn offs in this article, this one is agreed on by just about every guy.
Playing games is not cool at all. Waiting a certain amount of time to text back, mentioning other dates to make them jealous, or simply pretending to be someone else means you deserve not to get a second date. Just be yourself!
The simplest way he can communicate that he likes you is by setting up a second date. This is a clearer sign of interest than any body language or eye contact could ever be. When he suggests you go out again, feel free to suggest things to do for the second date.
Waiting 2–3 days or up to a week before reaching out gives him a chance to text you first once he realizes what he's missing. If you've waited more than a week and still haven't heard back from him, it might be time to move on. It's really hard when a guy flakes out on you, but there are other people out there for you!
“I don't think there's any right or wrong when it comes to kissing on the first date; it's just how you're feeling, what the vibe is, what the connection is, what you're comfortable with,” said Durocher.
When to Ask for a Second Date. You should ask for a second date within two to five days of your first date. This timeframe shows a genuine interest in the person and conveys you enjoy their company enough to ask for a second date.
Introduction: My name is Terence Hammes MD, I am a inexpensive, energetic, jolly, faithful, cheerful, proud, rich person who loves writing and wants to share my knowledge and understanding with you.
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