What is a manipulative apology?
These manipulative apologies are a type of blame-shift apologies that blame the victim. Instead of taking responsibility for what they did, they make the entire thing your fault and demand an apology from you.
A non-apology apology, sometimes called a backhanded apology, nonpology, or fauxpology, is a statement in the form of an apology that does not express remorse, or assigns fault to those ostensibly receiving the apology.
Toxic people will never apologise for their words and actions because they can't see anything wrong with them. They feel that they are the victim and will often twist and retell what happened to such an extent that they honestly can't see an alternative perspective.
Key points. Gaslighting is psychological abuse through verbal, written, and/or physical actions that cause the recipient to question their reality. A non-apology is used to deflect, pretend to apologize, and ultimately win the disagreement by placing blame back on the individual.
An apology to a narcissist means: Look how good I am. Now you owe me forgiveness. We wont talk about this again. Our relationship is still on my terms, but I appear to care about your feelings.
Im sorry, Im sorry, Im sorry. This is a passive-aggressive apology done to silence the other person and move onto a different topic. It minimizes what the other person has experienced. Im sorry but But is a qualifier. If a person cannot say sorry without adding a but, then they are not sorry.
Manipulators are experts in exaggeration and generalization. They may say things like, “No one has ever loved me.” They use vague accusations to make it harder to see the holes in their arguments. This tactic used by manipulators is meant to poke at your weaknesses and make you feel insecure.
- Showing Empathy. Showing empathy can help people forgive and let go of their anger easier. ...
- Offering A Complete Apology. ...
- Creating The Right Environment. ...
- Being Transparent And Honest. ...
- Writing An Apology Letter. ...
- Waiting Patiently For Full Forgivance. ...
- Apologizing Again (After They Forgave You)
Over-apologizing refers to saying “I'm sorry” when you don't need to. This could be when you haven't done anything wrong or you're taking responsibility for someone else's mistake or a problem that you didn't cause or control.
Manipulation is when a person uses controlling and harmful behaviors to avoid responsibility, conceal their true intentions, or cause doubt and confusion. Manipulation tactics, such as gaslighting, lying, blaming, criticizing, and shaming, can be incredibly damaging to a person's psychological well-being.
