Why Do People Hate Talking About Money? - There Should Be More Money Talks! (2024)

It seems like many people think that talking about money is more taboo than talking about sex or politics. Recently, I was on Facebook and someone I know asked their friends how much money they were saving each month. It seemed like a pretty harmless question. They explained that they were asking for real numbers…

It seems like many people think that talking about money is more taboo than talking about sex or politics.

Recently, I was on Facebook and someone I know asked their friends how much money they were saving each month. It seemed like a pretty harmless question.

They explained that they were asking for real numbers because they just began saving and simply wanted to talk with others about saving money.

Then, someone commented with something like, “Sharing actual numbers is disgusting. Use percentages, if you must.”

The conversation continued, others chimed in, and it became clear that openly talking about money made some people pretty angry. There was an overwhelming amount of people who said the whole conversation was tacky and that money should not be discussed, EVER.

Why does talking about money have to be so secretive? Is it really that tacky?

Having a financial blog means I get some interesting emails about this sort of thing, some from people who think it’s crazy that I publish income reports and talk about money so openly. So, I’m very aware of the stigma that comes with talking about money.

In fact, according to a survey conducted by Ally Bank, 70% of Americans think that it’s rude to talk about money. Respondents said they were more likely to disclose their income (39%) over savings (30%) or debt (29%) to family and friends.

And, it doesn’t end there. People don’t like to talk about how much they pay in rent, their monthly mortgage payment, or even how much they spend on internet service.

Why does your internet bill have to be secretive?

Talking about money is even seen as taboo among close family members, even among married couples. According to a survey done by Fidelity, 43% of respondents don’t know how much their partner earns, and 36% are unaware of the amount they have invested.

Here’s one last interesting study that I’d like to bring up, University College London found that people were seven times more likely to talk to a stranger about sex, affairs, and sexually transmitted diseases than discussing their salary.

You’d tell a stranger that you have an STD rather than tell them how much you make?

This is just crazy!

I think we should all be more open about money. Money is a topic that influences all of our lives, whether we want to believe it or not.

Related:

  • 15 Reasons You’re Broke And Can’t Save Money
  • 30+ Ways To Save Money Each Month
  • 8 Things To Sell To Make Money
  • How To Ditch The Revolving Debt Cycle

Here is why more people should start talking about money.

Talking about money can help you.

If you are someone that feels money talk is taboo, then it may be difficult to understand how openly talking about money can really help you out. If you aren’t talking about money, you may not know:

  • How much of a raise to ask for.
  • How to negotiate for the best salary.
  • The average selling price for houses.
  • What you should be paying in rent.
  • Whether or not your expenses (utilities, phone, insurance, etc.) are normal or unusually high.

And, more than anything, without talking about money, it would be hard to realize that you need to improve your financial situation.

Many people don’t like talking about money because it becomes “too real.” They may even feel shame about their financial mistakes, or they may feel that they aren’t doing as well as others.

Well, you’re never going to do any better if you aren’t aware of your financial situation.

Being in the dark isn’t going to help anyone. It might actually hold you back because you’re just taking a random guess at everything.

However, if you know things like the average salary for a person in your position, you’ll be able to use that information to your benefit. It can help you negotiate a raise and start earning more.

Also, by knowing how much a person is paying for rent or even car insurance, you’ll know if you are paying too much. This can help you make changes that will allow you to start saving more money.

The list goes on and on.

Knowledge is power, and knowing more about money will help you!

Knowing your family’s finances is important.

If you take anything out of this article, it should be that fully understanding your family’s financial situation is a must.

There are many financial horror stories where one spouse doesn’t realize the other has hundreds of thousands of dollars of debt. Or, one spouse thinks the family is financially sound, when in reality, the truth is the exact opposite.

I’ve heard so many people say that they have no idea what their monthly mortgage or rent payment is, they don’t know how much they are putting towards retirement, and so on.

Even more shocking, some are completely unaware of how much debt they have and can’t even estimate how much they owe. Or, if they do make a guess, their spouse blurts out how wrong they are.

Sadly, this is surprisingly common.

A family who has regular money talks and budget meetings is more likely to be financially successful and happier than a family that doesn’t.

There are many ways for these talks to help you and your family.

  • You can work together and succeed. If you are both putting effort towards your financial goals, you can tackle them as a team and are much more likely to have a positive outcome.
  • A lack of money communication can lead to financial infidelity. According to an article on Forbes, 20% of those in the U.S. keep financial secrets, and 7% of people between the ages of 18-49 have a secret bank account or a secret credit card they keep from their partner.
  • Knowing your financial situation will help you keep a budget. Understanding your financial situation means you can create and keep a budget that works for you. You will know more about the amount of money you are spending, whether you are living paycheck to paycheck, and more.
  • Being aware may prevent everything from falling on one person. Everyone should be aware of their financial situation. It’s not fair for one person to manage it all, and you would be in for a rude awakening if something were to happen to that person.
  • Being involved can help you with your family’s goals. It would be quite difficult for a person to work towards their family’s financial goals if they weren’t aware of their financial situation. Being involved can help keep you motivated and know what’s going on.
  • Regular money talks can lead to less fighting. When you are open about money in your relationship, you are less likely to have financial surprises and money fights. This is because conducting regular money talks and budget meetings means you will both be aware of what’s going on.

Recommended reading: Family Budget Meetings – Yes, You Need To Have Them

Talking about money doesn’t have to be awkward.

You shouldn’t be afraid to have money talks with friends and family. It doesn’t have to be awkward, and you can talk about money in a way that helps everyone.

Here are a few suggestions for talking about money with your family and friends:

  • Talk about your financial goals and why you want to reach them.
  • Share how much debt you have and how you’re trying to change it.
  • If you know a great way to save money, share it with others.
  • Brainstorm ideas for making more money.

There are many ways you can start talking about money with others in your life, and it can really help out everyone involved.

How does talking about money make you feel? Is talking about money taboo? Should it be?

Why Do People Hate Talking About Money? - There Should Be More Money Talks! (2024)

FAQs

Why do people hate talking about money? ›

According to Brad Klontz, CFP, founder of the Financial Psychology Institute, on a blog by Northwestern Mutual, people may be disinclined to talk about money because they feel vigilant and protective over their social status. “Money is very tightly linked to our status,” Klontz said.

Why do people avoid talking about finances? ›

Fear of appearing greedy or materialistic

Talking about finances can make some people feel as though they are being greedy or materialistic. The fear of being perceived this way may cause you to avoid discussing money altogether.

Why don t people like to talk about how much money they make? ›

Many people don't talk about money. They believe it's a taboo subject, and that it should be kept private. We keep “money” in the dark. We attach the value of making or not making money to our self worth, instead of seeing money as a tool to create a bigger, better life for ourselves.

Why are people reluctant to talk about money? ›

Half of women said they were reluctant to talk about money because they consider it a private topic, compared to 41% of men, according to the survey, from Wells Fargo in partnership with Versta Research. Feeling judged was another top-cited reason for 35% of women and 31% of men.

Why shouldn't we talk about money? ›

It's taboo: It's considered socially unacceptable to talk about money. If you're well-off, you'll be perceived as boastful. If you're broke, people will think you're begging. Nobody wants to hear either.

Is it bad taste to talk about money? ›

She went on to say that it's gauche to talk about money if it's is no object for you, but if it's critical to your survival, and you're not just being nosy, you should feel free to ask.

Why is money so hard to talk about? ›

But we can't talk about it because so many people have it and don't want to admit it, since it might diminish their achievements or their position. And so many people who don't have money are made to feel asshamed. As if it's an inherent failing.

Is it okay to talk about money? ›

Stay in control and talk money

Talking about money can be uncomfortable and some people avoid this at all costs. But when you let go of the fear, a good money conversation can put you in a position to help improve your financial future.

Why are finances scary? ›

Money can trigger deep fears because we use it to pay for food, shelter, and heat. So when we fear we don't have enough money, it literally triggers a fear of survival... even if the fear may be irrational. And you don't have to be in dire straights to feel afraid.

Why does talking about money make me angry? ›

Many people don't like talking about money because it becomes “too real.” They may even feel shame about their financial mistakes, or they may feel that they aren't doing as well as others.

Why do people not like to talk about their pay? ›

Conversations can evoke feelings of jealousy and inequity among co-workers who most likely are unaware of the reasons for salary differences, including education, experience and training. Suspicion, distrust and other negative emotions often result from salary discussions and seriously affect company morale.

Is it rude to talk about how much money you have? ›

It's rude to ask how much money someone else makes, and it's also disrespectful to share how much money you make unless there is a good reason to do so, i.e., someone is looking for a job in your field and wants to know a typical salary range. But, again, this can make people feel uncomfortable.

Why do people dislike talking about money? ›

So it's not surprising that many of us keep our views about finances and our own financial status to ourselves. "Discomfort with money talk stems from fear of judgement. For those with few resources, they fear being looked down upon. People may think they are lazy, stupid or a poor money manager.

Why is money an uncomfortable topic? ›

When it comes to talking about money, most people would do just about anything to avoid the topic because it brings up so much fear and anxiety, especially in women. We are so afraid to discuss our finances, ask for a raise, or deal with our overwhelming debt that just the thought of it just makes us want to puke.

Why am I afraid to talk about money? ›

A fear of money can be caused by many things, including a lack of financial education, past financial trauma, and negative money messages you learned as a child.

Why is talking about money so hard? ›

People often feel bad about how much money they have. So, not talking about it makes that feeling of badness go away. That's at the upper end. Meanwhile, among middle-class Americans, the piece says, the ban on talking about money is instead often brought on by financial precarity.

Why do people hate asking for money? ›

Very few people like asking for money, and no one finds it easy – we universally hate it. Why? Because asking for money brings up thousands of insecurities and doubts. We're scared to look money in the face, and to put ourselves out there, formally stating where we stand in a value equation.

Why is talking about money vulgar? ›

Society has perpetuated the notion that it is rude to discuss money. Many people were raised with the belief that discussing personal finances is a private matter and should be kept within the confines of one's household. Even in a close family setting, money can cause tension.

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