Thank-You Notes: To Send or Not To Send? (2024)

Thank-You Notes: To Send or Not To Send? (1)

Thank-You Notes: To Send or Not To Send? (2)

It’s never wrong to send a written thank you, and people always appreciate getting “thanks” in writing.

Why? Handwritten notes are warmer and more special than other forms of thank yous. The rule of thumb is that you should send a written note any time you receive a gift (even a ‘thank you’ gift) and the giver wasn’t there to be thanked in person. But notes are not always necessary. If, for example, the gift is from a close friend or relative (and it’s not a wedding gift) you can email or call instead if you prefer. Below are some other note-writing guidelines:

Shower Thank You Notes

Even though the gift giver attended the shower in your honor and you had a chance to say thanks for her gift, you should still send a written note.

Wedding Thank You Cards

Each wedding gift should be acknowledged with a written note within three months of receipt of the gift. It’s best to write the notes as soon as possible after gifts arrive, however. Write a note even if you have thanked the giver in person.

Congratulatory gifts or cards

Anyone who sends a present, or a card with a personally written message, should receive a note in return.

Gifts received during an illness

Thank-you notes should be written as soon as the patient feels well enough—or a friend or relative can write the notes to acknowledge the gifts. It’s also okay to call or email close friends rather than write. The important point is to be sure the gift is acknowledged in a timely fashion, not to create a burden for the person who is ill or recovering.

Condolence notes or gifts

Everyone who has sent a personal note, flowers, or a donation should get a written thank-you. A close friend or relative can write the notes on the recipient’s behalf.

Thank-You Notes: To Send or Not To Send? (2024)

FAQs

When not to send a thank you note? ›

If it's something they've sent because there was a death in the family, a new baby, or something time-consuming or emotionally taxing going on, I might take them up on their offer not to write a thank you—even if it's for a short time and only until I can send a note once things aren't so hectic,” says Southern Living ...

What is the proper etiquette for sending thank you notes? ›

Send your thank you as soon as possible following the event, preferably within one week — but in a bind, it's okay to send it up to a few weeks after. If this thank you is going to a friend, keep things casual and use your own voice to make it sound conversational.

Should I send a thank you email for answers received? ›

Sending a quick thank-you email after getting a question answered is a polite way to let someone know you received their response. It doesn't have to be anything special–oftentimes the shortest ones are the best.

Do you need to respond to a thank you note? ›

The right thing to do after someone sends you a note of appreciation is to respond. But not because thank you note etiquette demands it. Responding to a thank you is a great way to build on a relationship and validate the writer's good feelings about you! Your response doesn't have to be a long one.

Is it OK to not reply to thank you? ›

Responding to a “thank you” email is considered discretionary. Consider your personality and your audience. If you are a chatty person in face to face conversations, it may be best to respond to a “thank you” email. However, if you are not very outgoing, you can probably get away without a response.

Is it rude to not send thank you cards? ›

Not sending a thank you card after a business meeting, interview, referral or deal can make you seem rude, ungrateful or forgetful. It can make the other person feel unappreciated or ignored. It can also make you look unprofessional or inexperienced.

What not to do in a thank you letter? ›

7 common thank-you note mistakes
  1. Mistake #1: Waiting too long to send it.
  2. Mistake #2: Being careless with mistakes or typos.
  3. Mistake #3: Making it too long or too short.
  4. Mistake #4: Being too generic.
  5. Mistake #5: Making it all about yourself.
  6. Mistake #6: Starting every sentence with “I.”
  7. Mistake #7: Being too pushy.

How long should you send a thank you note? ›

In general, you should send business thank you cards as soon as possible, while the event is still fresh in the other party's mind. However, for all other gifts and kind gestures, etiquette on thank you notes dictates you likely have one to two weeks to send out your cards.

Do you really need to write thank you notes? ›

While you may have noticed that thank-you notes for birthday gifts are not the norm they once were (back in the days when kids sent and received mail), the etiquette experts that HuffPost consulted all agreed that saying thanks is one gesture that never goes out of style.

Is it bad if you don t get a response from a thank you email after an interview? ›

Finally, if you still don't receive a response to your thank-you note or your follow-up message, you should learn from the experience and move on. Don't take it personally or let it discourage you. Sometimes, hiring managers are too busy, forgetful, or rude to reply.

Is it appropriate to email a thank you note? ›

Often overlooked, a simple thank-you note or email can be appropriate in various situations, such as when a former manager writes you a reference letter or after a coworker helps you solve a tough problem.In this article, we explore the steps for writing a professional thank-you email, complete with examples and ...

How do you say thank you for your response email etiquette? ›

If you want to thank someone for their prompt response, you can outright thank them with a phrase like, “Thank you for your quick response—I really appreciate you getting back to me so soon.” But if you want to show more appreciation (which is always good!), you can write a longer message explaining more about how ...

What is etiquette for thank you notes? ›

Mail promptly. Timely thank-you notes are preferable however, the time frame is dictated by the occasion. Following a wedding, proper etiquette suggests sending thank-you notes within one year, but sooner is always better. After attending a dinner party, however, it's best to send your note within one week.

When someone texts thank you should you respond? ›

“No problem” is a commonly accepted response to thank you in many contexts. While some may prefer a more traditional reply such as “you're welcome,” “no problem” is generally viewed as an informal, friendly way to express gratitude and acknowledgement.

Is it proper to text a thank you note? ›

“Sometimes a quick text will suffice, like if you thank someone for the flowers they sent for watching their pet when they were away,” said Ms. Pantzer, who started her brand to revive the tradition of written letters. “But in most cases, a note is appropriate.” The ideal note is short and to the point.

Why do Millennials not send thank you notes? ›

Millennials and Generation Z have radically different attitudes toward things like work culture, dining and even thank-you cards. We simply do not place value on thank-you cards like previous generations.

Should you always write a thank you note? ›

While you may have noticed that thank-you notes for birthday gifts are not the norm they once were (back in the days when kids sent and received mail), the etiquette experts that HuffPost consulted all agreed that saying thanks is one gesture that never goes out of style.

How late is too late to send a thank you note? ›

Like an earnest compliment or heartfelt gift, a thank-you note is a thoughtful gesture that—more important than the specific thanks it expresses—shows the recipient that you value your relationship with them. And for that reason alone, we say it's never too late to send a thank-you note.

What should you avoid in a thank you letter? ›

7 common thank-you note mistakes
  • Mistake #1: Waiting too long to send it.
  • Mistake #2: Being careless with mistakes or typos.
  • Mistake #3: Making it too long or too short.
  • Mistake #4: Being too generic.
  • Mistake #5: Making it all about yourself.
  • Mistake #6: Starting every sentence with “I.”
  • Mistake #7: Being too pushy.

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