Shaking Your Fist in the Face of God: Dealing with Anger Towards God | Tacoma Christian Counseling (2024)

Have you ever questioned, blamed, or even lashed out against God when confronted with difficult, traumatic, and grievous circ*mstances? This reaction is more typical than you would expect.

A Christian woman recently told me that she was dealing with anger towards God for the pain and suffering she endured when her husband died suddenly, leaving her with few resources. She had concluded that she had cruelly been a victim of a marriage of convenience while being otherwise deceived by the deceased.

Her unfortunate situation was compounded by the discovery that her children took little interest in her plight. She descended into an abyss of self-pity, resentment, and anger towards God.

How many of us, when confronted with hardship, adversity, injustice, misfortune, and/or affliction develop anger towardsGod? Why is this the case and how does this put into play a spiritual dynamic that bleeds over into making our situation far worse?

In approaching this topic, it is worth considering a chapter in the book, Good and Angry: Redeeming Anger, Irritation, Complaining, and Bitterness, entitled “Anger at God.” Author David Powlison claims that enmity against God is nothing less than an enduring quality of mankind’s sinful fallen state.

He writes that this enmity usually operates quietly until provoked by various circ*mstances, and he gives several biblical quotations to illustrate:

• People will often blame God when what they have lived for comes up empty. “When a man’s folly brings his way to ruin, his heart rages against the Lord” (Proverbs 19:3).
• When God’s children wandered about in the wilderness, He summed up their attitude as, “They grumble against Me” (Numbers 14:27). Quarreling with God is a baseline human characteristic.
• When hardships seem overwhelming, God is often a scapegoat. Job was in unrelenting pain, and his wife’s reaction was, “Do you still hold fast your integrity? Curse God and die” (Job 2:9).
• When God blesses someone we wish he would curse, anger can erupt. God showed mercy to Nineveh, and “it displeased Jonah exceedingly, and he was angry [with God]” (Jonah 4:1).
• When men and women reap what they sow, they often harshly judge the One who rightly judges them. People “cursed the God of heaven for their pain and sores. They did not repent of their deeds” (Revelation 16:11).
• Hostility directed towards God often lands on His servants. For example, David and Jesus owned the words, “The reproaches of those who reproach You have fallen on me” (Psalm 69:9; Romans 15:3). The Gospels go on to bear witness to the continual animosity that Jesus faced – at His birth, throughout His ministry, and in His betrayal and death. “The world…hates Me because I testify about it that its works are evil” (John 7:7).

Why Do We Experience Anger Towards God?

It would appear that in times of trouble we do not (or cannot) listen to what God is saying. It could be likened to children who know better than to heed the advice of parents. Our love of self and the world interferes from hearing what He has to say and to know how to react.

My simple response to the woman who admitted to being angry at God was merely to suggest that this was a time when God was breaking barriers to get her attention and speak to her if she would but forsake her natural inclinations.

Despite the experiential mercies and patience of our Creator, self-will stands behind a person’s anger towards God. It erupts when their power and control over people and situations are disrupted. Underneath, it is motivated by an intrinsic belief that man, not God, must have the last say on whatever happens. Even though the Christian has committed himself to the will of God and to the hardships of living out his faith, unfortunately double-mindedness often kicks in when their self-will is threatened.

When things don’t go our way, we get angry, first at others, and then more importantly, at God. Perhaps we were betrayed by someone who pledged their love and loyalty to us. Our hopes were dashed when we innocently believed that we had their commitment, love, and partnership. Our faith in them and in God was trampled upon. Anger rages against them and against God for permitting it. Perhaps we were witnesses to atrocities that God could have prevented. We have recurrent traumatic memories that keep our anger towardsGod alive.

Andrew D. Lester, in the Journal of Pastoral Theology, lists several reasons why people get angry with God. He writes that it often arises when God is blamed for a tragedy or event. It is often the automatic negative response when people hold God as ultimately responsible for things that have caused substantial anguish. In other words, when a faith narrative is threatened, anger toward God can be the favored response.

When God’s character, sovereignty, or love is called into question, anger toward Him can take center stage. People can become enraged at God if they think God should have protected them in the way that they think He should have, if He didn’t answer their prayers in the time frame that they specified, or if they no longer feel His presence. People can also become frustrated with God when they demand and don’t receive a plausible explanation for why God did or didn’t do something that was expected.

Solutions to Get Rid of Anger Towards God

Chronicling the humanistic solutions to anger against God is more than interesting – it is downright seductive arguments to consider God as if He were of no real significance.

First, consider the argument that when we experience anger towardsGod we should not feel guilty about this, since God is the One who created us to have such angry emotions.

Secondly, we’re told by the secular press that we’re justified in being angry with Him since He often could stop bad things from happening but does nothing to stop it.

Third, we’re told that expressing anger with God should never be repressed since this would be hypocritical and undermine a mature relationship with Him.

Fourth, the argument is presented that we need to forgive God for what He didn’t do for us when we were in need.

One biblical solution to the problem of shaking our fist in the face of God is the apostle Paul’s assurance that when our pride generates anger towardsGod, we can count on God to give the grace that is needed to heed His voice and to trust Him in all His ways (James 4:6). This assurance is also found in 1 Corinthians 10:13, which says that “There is no temptation taken you but such as is common to man: but God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that you are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that you may be able to bear it.”

In essence, biblical admonitions (also found in some therapeutic interventions) which address the problem of being angry with God tell us to accept what is by exercising faith and trust in God as a child accepts and trusts in their loving parents. We’re to be careful not to blame, curse, rebel, resist, or abandon God in the heat of disappointment and disillusionment.

Rather than express unbelief, skepticism and anger toward God, our hearts are called to be softened toward Him who may allow grievous things to happen. For example, when Job’s wife told Job to curse God and die, he answered with faith by saying unto her, “You speak as one of the foolish women speaks. What? shall we receive good at the hand of God, and shall we not receive evil?” and in all this did not Job sin with his lips (Job 2:10). Again, in Ruth 1:20, Naomi recognized that being afflicted had been her life, yet did not lay accusations against God.

This kind of tough faith flies in the face of secular teaching. The Scriptures are clear that anger against God is a moral issue. It is not consistent with an abiding faith in Him. We can be assured that living in a world under the control of Satan, we will have difficult times. Adversity is not meted out by the One in whom we trust, but in His archenemy, the devil.

The suffering we experience cannot be laid at the feet of our God, but is caused by the one who seeks the demise of God’s people. Yes, affliction and adversity are not easy to bear, but overcoming faith believes for God’s intervention in His time despite appearances to the contrary. It is our commitment as Christians not to fall into the snare of accusing God for the works of the devil which, by definition, is blasphemy.

We must not be fooled to overlook the seriousness of being angry at God. It is a hostile and sinful response to what has happened. Those who say we should vent our anger towards God miss the importance of turning our attention to the promises of God and of the need to continue in childlike faith to believe what He has promised. Although the psalmist gives voice to his grief, it does not lead to shaking a fist in God’s face, but rather a renewing of faith in Him whom he trusts.

A study in the Journal of Psychology and Theology has shown that feelings of anger towards God are decreased and intimacy with Him is increased among subjects who meditated daily on devotional readings in psalms of lamentation over a four week period.This article acknowledges that anger towardsGod often accompanies personal suffering as people doubt the goodness of God, the power of God, and even the existence of God.

In the introduction to this article, the authors note that anger towardsGod is short-lived as people gain more insight into the situation that evoked it, as people reappraised God’s intentions, as people accepted what had occurred, and as they came to see that God was not at fault.

Incidentally, the author cites that prayer interventions also have been found to be effective in resolving this problem. The experiment concluded that meditating on psalm lamentations decreased the intensity of emotional, spiritual, and physical pain as well as the processing of difficult emotions and beliefs.

The message to Christians is that anger towards God leads away from faith in Him. It breeds a distaste for Him and distrust in Him and in His goodness. Perhaps more importantly, it is a means whereby sins can be justified which can add to the grief already suffered. Suffering is the time when God provides the opportunity to grow and mature in their Christian experience.

God Knows Better Than I

Consider the lyrics to the followingchildren’s song, foundin a video on Joseph who was sold into slavery and who encountered various trials of faith before being promoted to a governor of Egypt by the Pharaoh. The song is entitled, “You know better than I.”

Here are the lyrics:

I thought I did what’s right

I thought I had the answers

I thought I chose the surest road

But that road brought me here

So I put up a fight

And told you how to help me

Now just when I have given up

The truth is coming clear

Chorus 1:

You know better than I

You know the way

I’ve let go the need to know why

For You know better than I

If this has been a test

I cannot see the reason

But maybe knowing

I don’t know is part of getting through

I tried to do what’s best

But faith has made it easy

To see the best thing I can do

Is to put my trust in You.

Chorus 2:

For, You know better than I

You know the way

I’ve let go the need to know why

For You know better than I

Coda:

I saw one cloud and thought it was a sky

I saw a bird and thought that I could follow

But it was You who taught that bird to fly

If I let You reach me

Will You teach me.

(Repeat Chorus )

For, You know better than I

You know the way

I’ve let go the need to know why

I’ll take what answers you supply

You know better than I