21 Subtle Signs She Wants You Back but Is Scared (2024)

Breaking up is never easy; sometimes, it’s just a phase leading to reevaluation and reconsideration. There can be instances when your girlfriend breaks up with you, and she may regret her decision later. Instead, she might want you back but doesn’t know what to do.

So, are you wondering whether your ex-girlfriend still has feelings for you but is too scared to admit it? Then, you’ve come to the right place! Here, we’ll look at signs she wants you back but is scared and hesitant to take the plunge.

Understanding these signs and the reasons behind her fears can help you navigate the path to reconciliation with empathy and sensitivity. Pay attention to these signs so you’ll know whether there is a chance that you will get back together with your ex or not.

9 reasons why a woman might be scared to get back with her ex

Deciding whether to get back with an ex-partner can be an emotionally charged and complex decision, particularly for women who might have various valid reasons to be hesitant. Here are nine potential reasons why a woman might be scared to rekindle a relationship with her former partner:

• Fear of repeating past mistakes: One of the most common fears is that history might repeat itself. Women may remember the issues or conflicts that led to the breakup and worry about falling into the same patterns.
• Lack of trust: Trust is essential in any relationship. If trust was eroded in the previous relationship due to betrayal, dishonesty, or other reasons, a woman may be apprehensive about trusting her ex again.
• Emotional scars: Past emotional pain can linger, making it difficult to open up to the possibility of getting hurt once more. Women may fear reopening old wounds and the emotional toll it can take.
• Changed priorities: Over time, people evolve, and their priorities shift. A woman might have new life goals, interests, or values that don’t align with her ex-partner’s, causing hesitation about reconciling.
• Compatibility concerns: A breakup usually occurs because of fundamental incompatibilities. These concerns may still be valid, making a woman reluctant to ignore them and re-enter a relationship that might not work. If she still thinks you’re not highly compatible, it probably will get her scared to get back together.
• Family and friends’ opinions: The input of loved ones can play a significant role. Negative opinions or concerns from family and friends can create doubts and fear about pursuing a reunion.
• Fear of vulnerability: Reconnecting with an ex requires vulnerability, which can be intimidating. Women may fear showing their true selves and potentially facing rejection or judgment.
• Independence: After a breakup, many women discover newfound independence and self-reliance. Returning to a relationship may feel like relinquishing that independence, causing anxiety.
• Fear of getting hurt again: The fear of experiencing heartbreak once more can be paralyzing. Women may wonder if it’s worth risking their emotional well-being for a second chance with an ex-partner.

Ultimately, the decision to get back with an ex is deeply personal and should be made after careful consideration of these fears and any other relevant factors. It’s crucial for individuals to prioritize their emotional well-being and happiness in making such a significant choice.

21 subtle signs she wants you back but is scared

It can be challenging to decipher someone’s feelings, especially when it comes to wanting to rekindle a past relationship. While there’s no surefire way to know someone’s true intentions, there are some subtle signs that might indicate she wants you back but is scared.

Remember that these signs are not definitive proof and should be interpreted cautiously. Communication and open conversation are essential to understanding each other’s feelings better. Here are some possible signs she wants you back but is scared:

1. She still communicates

One of the potential signs your ex wants you back but is scared is that she still talks to you. In some instances, if she were done with you, she wouldn’t want anything else to do with you.

On the other hand, if she is still communicating with you, she probably doesn’t want you out of her life. Talking to each other effectively is one of the top requirements for a healthy relationship.

So, if you are talking and able to get along, there might be a chance that you can work on your relationship again.

2. She asks about you

Another tip on how to know if she still wants you is that she asks about you. She may call you to ask how you are or talk to others you know to keep tabs on you.

Either way, this shows that she cares about you and wants to ensure you are doing well. She may not do this if she doesn’t still have feelings for you.

3. She talks to your family and friends

Besides just asking about you, she also talks to your family and friends. She may feel like she’s still a part of your family, even after she has ended her relationship with you.

So, if she is still communicating with your friends and family, this could be one of the signs your ex wants you back but won’t admit it when this is the case. Ask people close to you if your ex has been keeping up with them.

4. She seems jealous

Have you noticed that your ex seems jealous if other girls look at you or when she isn’t with you? This could answer the question, “Does she want to get back together?”

Pay attention to how she acts when she sees you, especially if you are out in public. This may give you plenty of clues to decipher.

5. She checks up on you online

She may also stalk your social media accounts when she wants you back. She might feel like she needs to know what you are doing and who you hang out with when she isn’t around.

If she sends you messages online or likes your posts and photos, these can all be the potential signs she wants you back.

6. She talks about when you were dating

If your ex is suddenly waxing poetic about when you were dating or remembering all the good times you have had together, there’s a chance that she isn’t done with you yet.

You could consider it as one of the signs she wants you back. Be sure to listen to what she says and pay attention to how she acts as she talks about the past.

7. She keeps sending texts

There can be plenty of signs she wants you back but is scared that your ex may exhibit, but one sign you can’t ignore is when she keeps texting you. This could indicate that she misses or wants to keep up with you.

Additionally, she may want to ensure she knows how to contact you if she needs something or hopes to reconnect.

8. She dresses up around you

Ensure that you notice what your ex wears when she is around you. If it seems like she is dressing up or taking special care with her hair and makeup, this might let you know that she may want to pursue a relationship with you again.

Getting primped to see you could also answer how to know if she wants you back. She likely wouldn’t put time and energy into her appearance if she were no longer interested in you.

9. She asks you out

Upon occasion, your ex may ask if you want to hang out. After she does, she may tell you she has changed her mind. However, she may keep the dates she sets with you. In other words, she may find an excuse to hang out with you often.

If she asks out regularly, this could be one of the top signs she wants a relationship but is scared. She might tell you that you are just hanging out as friends but not dating, even though she could act like you are in a relationship.

10. She talks to others about you

An ex that still likes you may talk to others about you. Perhaps she tells her friends how much she misses you or tells people that you know that she wants to know how you are doing.

If this is the case and you hear about it from people you know, it could make you question whether she is scared of her feelings for me. She might be, but you may be able to do something to change her fears.

11. She isn’t dating

When your ex isn’t dating other people, this can be a sign she wants to get back together.

If she wants to enter into a relationship with someone else, she is free to do so, but when she chooses not to, you may wonder, “Is my ex scared to contact me?” This could mean she still has feelings for you.

She may not know what she wants to do about them yet. You may get back together, depending on what she decides.

12. She is intimate with you

It can be hard to imagine that your ex doesn’t want to have a relationship with you if she still sometimes spends intimate time with you. This could be one of many signs she wants you back but is scared.

She may miss you and wish to remain close to you, but she doesn’t know if she wants to date you again.

13. She’s still rooting for you

You might find that your ex still calls you on holidays, your birthday, or when you accomplish a goal, like getting a promotion or finishing a big project.

When this happens, it probably indicates that your ex is scared to get back together. However, she still cares about you, your well-being, and your accomplishments.

You might wonder, “Why is she scared of me?” However, this could be fine and shows that she wants to keep up with your achievements in life. Someone who wanted nothing to do with you would not do this.

14. She seems unsure of her feelings

If you see your ex and she acts differently to you from one day to the next, this may indicate that she isn’t exactly sure of how she feels about you. This could leave you wondering if my ex was scared to contact me.

It could also confuse you if you were hoping to get back together. It would help always to consider what you want from a future relationship to keep yourself from getting hurt.

When a person you are in a relationship with or want to be in one with doesn’t always act the same toward you, this could mean that it is an unhealthy connection.

Talk to your ex about what is going on and how she feels, and if she cannot give you a straight answer, you may want to keep your distance.

15. She jokes about getting back together

Anytime an ex jokes with you about getting back together, this may be precisely what she wants, but making light of it could be one of the significant signs she’s scared of getting hurt.

If you want to renew your relationship with her, you might need to ensure she knows you are interested. If there are issues you should work on that she commented on in the past, it may be a good idea to address some of them as well.

For instance, if she thought you were unmotivated or messy, and this caused a rift in your relationship, you might want to take the time and effort to become tidier and more organized. This can show her that you are willing to change and be more responsible.

16. She shares personal struggles

When your ex-girlfriend confides in you about her challenges, fears, or vulnerabilities, it can signify a desire for emotional intimacy. Sharing such information suggests she values your support and connection.

Your ex’s willingness to be vulnerable can be a subtle sign she wants to rebuild your relationship, but fear might be holding her back.

17. She initiates deep conversations

If she starts conversations about the past relationship, what went wrong, and how things could improve, it may indicate she’s seriously contemplating reconciliation. These discussions show she’s willing to address past issues and work toward a better future together.

Furthermore, these conversations can serve as a bridge to emotional healing, as they allow both of you to gain insights into what caused the previous difficulties and create a roadmap for a healthier, more fulfilling relationship ahead.

18. She tries to make you jealous

Some people use subtle attempts to make their ex-partners jealous as a way to gauge their feelings. If she brings up other guys or tries to incite jealousy, it could be her way of indirectly expressing interest while remaining cautious about rejection.

These actions may be her subtle way of sparking your attention, hoping to see if you still have feelings for her and if there’s a chance for a renewed connection without putting herself in a vulnerable position.

19. She talks about the future with you in it

Frequent references to future plans that include you, whether it’s discussing vacations, career aspirations, or life goals, signal her desire for you to be a significant part of her future. It can hint at her readiness to rebuild a life together.

These discussions not only showcase her interest but also illustrate her willingness to envision a shared future filled with adventures and accomplishments, reaffirming her hope for a rekindled connection and a lasting partnership.

20. She offers emotional support

Consistently being there for you during tough times, offering comfort, a listening ear, and encouragement demonstrates her ongoing care for you. Even if she’s unsure about rekindling the romance, this emotional support indicates a deep connection and concern for your well-being.

It’s a testament to her enduring friendship and the genuine bond that exists between you, reassuring you that her feelings go beyond mere romantic interest, encompassing a profound and lasting connection.

Watch this video to learn more about how you can repair your relationship and come out even better:

21. She gives you thoughtful gifts

Thoughtful gifts or surprises with sentimental value can be her way of expressing feelings she might not yet feel comfortable articulating. These gifts usually carry unspoken messages of love and the desire to reconnect on a deeper level.

They serve as tangible reminders of your shared history, each carefully chosen item representing a cherished memory or an unspoken hope for a renewed connection, making them powerful symbols of her affection and longing for a second chance at love.

How can you alleviate your ex’s fears?

Once you have noticed signs she wants you back but is scared, you may want to do all you can to alleviate her fears. This may involve being open and honest with your ex about how you feel.

If you want to get back together, let her know, but also inform her that you are willing to be patient while she decides what is suitable for her and makes a decision.

Of course, this doesn’t mean you should allow her to use you. When she is confused and unsure of her feelings for you, it may be necessary to help you remember what you meant to her. This could be able to cement her feelings for you.

Finally, it would help if you did what you could to care for yourself, physically and mentally. You might want to improve your eating and sleeping habits, exercise, and manage your finances. Changing your habits, even slightly, could make a big difference in how you feel.

When your ex sees that you have changed and grown up a bit, she may feel less scared and can help her make up her mind.

Seeing the differences in your life and routine will be more powerful than simply telling her about goals you hope to meet since she won’t be inclined to believe you.

Try your best and see what you can alter in your life since this can benefit you overall. She may notice and make up her mind about you, one way or another.

Commonly asked questions

Navigating the complexities of human emotions and relationships is a universal challenge. It’s not uncommon to find oneself in situations where feelings of love, fear, and uncertainty intersect.

In the following section, we’ll explore some frequently asked questions about these intricate emotions and how to understand and manage them in various relationship scenarios.

• Is she scared or not interested?

Determining whether she’s scared or uninterested can be challenging. Look for signs of nervousness or avoidance, but also respect her boundaries and communicate openly to understand her feelings better.

• Does my ex want me back but is scared?

Your ex might have lingering feelings but fear the possibility of getting hurt again. Open communication and rebuilding trust can help you both navigate these emotions and potentially rekindle the relationship.

• Does he have feelings for me but is scared?

If he’s showing mixed signals, he might be battling his emotions. Give him time and space to process, and encourage open dialogue to discover his true feelings.

• Can someone be scared of their feelings?

Yes, fear of vulnerability or past emotional wounds can make people hesitant to acknowledge or act on their feelings. Creating a safe and supportive environment to address these concerns is essential.

• Can you fear someone and love them?

Yes, it’s possible to love someone deeply while fearing the potential consequences of that love, such as rejection or heartbreak. Understanding and addressing these fears can lead to a healthier relationship.

Takeaway

So now you know the signs she wants you back but is scared to covey her true feelings. If your ex is showing you these signs, there is still a chance that you can get back together.

On the other hand, you should consider why the relationship ended in the first place. If there is something that she asked you to fix or improve upon and you didn’t, she may be unwilling to give you another chance.

Make sure to work on yourself and pay attention to the signs she wants you back but is scared. The way she behaves around you will give you all the information you need, so you’ll know how you must behave toward her.

However, talking about your expectations and boundaries in any relationship is essential, so always keep communication open. You may get your ex back in no time.